Carlile Keith Payne , 83, died July 29, 2021 at Highland Hospital after a short illness. Born August 25,1937, he was the son of The Rev. H. Glenn Payne and Florence Carlile Payne. Keith is survived by his cherished wife of nearly 61 years, Suzzy Payne, and their two beloved daughters and their families – Elizabeth Ashley Coscia and grandchildren Alexander Anthony Coscia and Isaac Edward Coscia of Sandy Hook, Ct; Margaret Gerry Russell and husband, Daniel, of Hinsdale, Illinois, and grandchildren Andrew Carlile Russell and Ella Jane Russell. He is also survived by his sister, Meredith Payne Button, West Palm Beach, Florida. Keith’s younger brother, Charles S Payne, died in 2006.
Calling hours will be Sunday, August 8th, 5-7 pm at the Richard Keenan Funeral Home (Egypt location) 7501 Pittsford Palmyra Road. Funeral Mass will be Monday, August 9th , 10am at St. Jeromes Church, 207 Garfield St., East Rochester, New York; followed by interment at White Haven Memorial Park, 201 Marsh Road, Pittsford, New York.
An important aspect of Keith all his life was his strong work ethic, from his first job, ages 12-16, as newspaper boy delivering 176 papers 6 days a week after school. At age 14 he added Friday nights as floor cleaner from 2-5 am at a Howard Johnsons restaurant. At 16 he worked Monday-Friday afternoons at a local bottling company unloading cases of dirty bottles and feeding them into washing machines. At the same time he added Saturdays assisting a busy Boston area wedding photographer. In spite of this work and school schedule Keith graduated from Wakefield High School in Wakefield, Massachusetts as Salutatorian, class of 1955.
Every summer from age 18-23, until two weeks before his wedding to Suzzy, Keith drove a Squirt delivery truck delivering beverage products throughout the greater Boston area.
Keith received a full scholarship to Brown University, Providence, Rhode Island, class of 1959. During his freshman and sophomore years, for the scholarship terms, he worked on campus cleaning dormitory rooms and bathrooms, often needing to pick up soiled clothes and towels from the floors before he could begin work! His junior and senior years he was promoted to a much easier work schedule in the Admissions Office as campus tour guide.
Keith and Suzzy met during Christmas break in 1958. They were both attending the National Student YM/YWCA Quadrennial Assembly at the University of Illinois in Urbana, Illinois. Suzzy was a college sophomore representing Randolph-Macon Woman’s College in Lynchburg, Va. Keith was a senior at Brown, attending as a national student leader, one of the four national Vice Presidents. There were 1200 college students attending the 6 day conference from all over the United States. About 200 students arrived two days early to be trained as assistants for the conference. As it happened, Suzzy was assigned as hostess for one of the 4 dining rooms and Keith was assigned to the same dining room as master of ceremonies being one of the four VPs. It was necessary for both of them to wait until all meals were over before they could eat and inevitably they sat together, and then Keith would walk Suzzy to the next plenary session. And so, their lifelong relationship began.
Keith’s mother often said, “ Keith never knew a stranger!”, which was a great attribute for a “P.K.= preachers kid”. His father was a beloved American Baptist minister so Keith spent most of every Sunday and several evenings a week involved in church activities during all his growing-up years. He knew church hymns by heart so well from his childhood that even in his older years, whenever a hymn would begin at Sunday morning church, Keith would whisper to Suzzy, with a wry grin, the corresponding correct hymn number from the old Baptist hymnal.
After college graduation Keith entered Andover-Newton Theological School in Newton Center, Mass. For three years his church assignment as a graduate student was at Old Cambridge Baptist Church in Harvard Square as College Student Director serving the students from nearby Harvard, Northeastern, and MIT. His 4th year internship was as College Student Director at John Hopkins University, Baltimore, Maryland. He received the Outstanding Homilist award at his 1963 graduation. Keith was ordained to the Christian Ministry on November 24, 1963 at the First Congregational Church of Chappaqua, New York.
In 1968 Keith led a student delegation from the US government to Europe for the International Student Assembly in Vienna and to meet with other delegations in Frankfort, Rome, and Paris. Suzzy tagged along. The final evening of the trip, July 28,1968, was at the American Embassy in Paris coinciding with the final meeting of the World Council of Churches. Billy Graham was also a guest that night.
Prior to coming to Rochester in 1972, Keith was the Director of College Student Services for the Central Atlantic Region of the National YMCA/YWCA.
Keith and Suzzy’s lifetime dreams came true with the arrival of their two precious daughters. Elizabeth Ashley arrived to their arms at Kennedy Airport at 1:40 am, February 20, 1969. She was nine months old – the youngest child up to that time to be released by the Korean government for overseas adoption. Their second precious daughter, Margaret Gerry, was born to them in July, 1969. On outings Keith pushed the carriage, Suzzy pushed the stroller, and they never once thought they were tired.
Keith always felt blessed to have had the experiences of twice serving as plane escort for babies and children arriving from Korea to waiting adoptive families.
During most of their 42 years in Rochester Keith worked as a Life Agent for several Rochester area brokerages and often drove Trailways charter buses on the weekends. Trains and buses were a lifetime passionate interest. His parents did not own a car until he was 12 years old. They went everywhere by buses, trains, and ferry boats, in the Pawtucket and Providence, Rhode Island area. His favorite “toy” was his Columbia bicycle. Keith and his brother, Charles, played “bus”, creating real crisscross bus routes all over town on their bikes.
But his deepest interest was trains – real trains – and the railroad systems of the United States and the world. A sentence in his college entrance essay read, “By the age of twelve I had read every book on railroads in the Boston Public Library”. And that was true!
Much of Keith’s bus and train memorabilia is on display at the Rochester and Genesee Valley Railroad Museum, in Rush, New York.
Since 1995 Keith and Suzzy have been blessed beyond measure by the arrival of their four grandchildren. Summertime weeks and Winter Break weeks have been spent delightfully with Alexander and Isabella Coscia creating memory upon memory of “Concoction Days”, the “Wild Wild Woods” adventures, and trips to Lancaster, PA for many sound and sight “Bible on Stage” performances. It was Alexander who gave Keith and Suzzy their happiest titles, “Poppy” and “Ommy”. Keith’s pain and mobility issues became more and more severe the summer of 2011. Isabella had to spend most of her one extra week that year just going to doctor appointments with Poppy and Ommy.
Christmas night, 2003, brought the birth of Andrew Carlile Russell. Keith was very honored that “Carlile” was chosen as a middle name, honoring Keith and thus Keith’s own beloved grandfather, Arthur Carlile, who emigrated to America from England in 1900. Andrew became Keith’s treasured trains companion – at least during the “Thomas the Tank Engine” years when the two of them could play at the train table for hours, oblivious to all else. Keith has always loved engaging Andrew’s quick mind in many fun and/or deep conversations. Ella Jane Russell, born 2008, has delighted her grandparents constantly with her sweet spirit and mature life wisdom. It has been a joy to observe the development of her many and varied talents. Finally, for years our family “hero” in all matters has been Margaret Gerry’s dear husband and Andrew and Ella’s father, Dan Russell.
All his life Keith had a servant’s heart – quick to help anyone, even in the most mundane matters. And he was a gentleman. He could not help it. He could not “dress down”. Even in the last ten years of maneuvering a walker everywhere he went, Keith somehow wanted to open a door, no matter how heavy, for any lady in front of him.
Keith was never afraid of tears. And he wept easily, especially in prayers, during hymns, or when thinking or speaking of his girls, or his grandchildren.
In his retirement years he was a steady help to Suzzy, lugging her bags of quilts and posters and books in and out of the classroom at Patricia’s Fabrics where Suzzy taught patchwork and quilting classes for 36 years. And besides, he thoroughly enjoyed chatting with her students as they entered and left.
New England – especially Rhode Island, Point Judith, and Block Island, was always Keith’s “heart’s home”. He yearned to smell the salt air again. But Keith and Suzzy’s cottage “starter home” and yard in Fairport gave him great joy and contentment. And he was always thankful for the tender attention of his many local, and now mostly much younger, friends.
For those wishing to do so, contributions may be made in Keith’s memory to: The Margaret Home, a residential empowerment program serving pregnant mothers and their children…….P.O.Box 214 East Rochester, NY 14445 Or online at www.themargarethome.com Or Operation Christmas Child Shoe Boxes c/o Samaritan’s Purse P.O. Box 3000 Boone, NC 28607
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17 responses to “Payne, Carlile Keith”
Dear Suzy, Ashley, Margaret and all other family members,
I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Although we have met Keith only once in 2004, we remember him as a warm personality with sincere interest in people and the world.
I will always rember that he told us that he would have adopted all 3 Korean sisters if he had been told that there were sisters… It would have meant that the sisters could have stayed together, but I would not have had Hanya as my dear Korean sister!
I wish you all strenght to cope with this loss.
Dear Miriam…you are lovely to write and tell how you remember Keith….thank you so much….our 3 families do have a unique and blessed bond….Suzzy
Dear Suzzy, Sharing Keith’s life story and your memories are a gift to all. I pray for you and your family, God grant you peace.
Wonderful to hear all that history of Keith and Suzzy. Praying for all of you! Stay safe!!!
Dear Suzzy and family,
What a lovely remembrance of a beautiful life. Heart felt sympathy for your loss. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Dear Suzzy and family,
We are so sorry with the loss of a great man, husband and father. I remember him as a wonderful loving father to my little sister, Thanks for knowing you all. Saskia send also her condoleance. Love Hanya and Saskia
B;esseJHanya and Saskia….to think ..from all the oceans of water separating our families…we somehow were reunited….Thank you so very much for writing…I love that you remember Keith so well….will write more later ands end programs…Love to all..Suzzy
Dear Suzzy,
Though I only had a short time before moving to Ohio, one of the most rewarding experiences I had was in meeting Keith & of course his lovely wife of 60 years. you. Since then you both corresponded with me with continued support for many years giving me joy & hope to continue my endeavors & keep the faith which I never gave up with the help of such lovely faithful friends. To me it was like a lifetime. I was very hurt when he was first injured in an accident with you & have had so much admiration for your bond of love in your marriage through your being so committed to the vows of in sickness & health that you honored up until the present. We can all take a lesson of the meaning of living a life devoted to God & the church, family, community & all the people you both have served together as husband & wife. I for one am sincerely grateful.
Dearest Suzzy,
My greatest sympathy in hearing of your loss. Although the years have been long since our last time spent together, my thoughts often return to you and Keith. It is an honor to remember Keith for the truly blessed man of God he was. I so often recall your visit to our home in Princeton, WV .and the prayer Keith and Charles shared for our son Braylon during his difficult time as an infant. Braylon is almost 16 now and has grown to be an exceptional young man with no evidence whatsoever of his previous struggle. Truly when praises go up blessings come down! Although we are apart l speak of you often to the children and have instilled in them the importance of family no matter the distance between us. Suzzy you are such a blessing to all that surround you. You have touched my life in ways you may never know. Truly an honor to be a part of such a wonderful family. We love you!
Suzzy, Ashley and Margaret,
I was so deeply sad to hear of Keith’s passing. He was a man who never stopped moving and was as you said working. I have so many fond memories of my years with your family and love you all. I shall always be grateful for the many times you and Keith have included me – especially the England trip, Mets games and trips to NYC, side job hustle mowing the lawn, painting and spending time with Keith. He was always special to me.
May you all share memories in the days ahead and remember him as a blessing to all who knew him. You were right Keith never knew a stranger! And most were touched by his love as subtle as he was with showing it. He always had a warm disposition, knowledge, and confidence that made you feel accepted just as as you were.
Suzzy you and Keith were perfect for each other – you both are so smart. Keith always loved a good debate and you did too.
Thanks you Suzzy and Keith for your family and may they be blessed by your memories Keith.
We are truly sorry for Keith’s passing. He and Suzzy always had a special place in our hearts as their Daughter Margaret Gerry. Our son and Margaret were very good friends during high school. We were thrilled and honored to stand up for them when they became Catholic. It was always a joy to visit with them and we will always keep you in our thoughts and prayers forever.
Dear Suzzy , you are in our prayers. I will truly miss my time with Keith. I loved sharing our talks . I learned a lot of him. May god and your family comfort you.at this time.
Suzzy, So sorry to hear about Keith. I will very much miss my visits with both of you! You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Suzzy and family, So sorry for your loss. What a wonderful tribute to your Keith’s life. Thoughts and prayers are with you.
What a beautiful tribute to Mr. Payne this morning.
Suzzy, you and Mr. Payne have always embodied Christian kindness and love and we consider you and your family, our family. You graciously opened your home to us and helped us through some of the hardest times of our lives. And you were there to celebrate our joyful moments.
We will always remember how much brighter you made life for us and how many of our traditions, that we still honor to this day, came from growing up with you as part of our extended family.
May Mr. Payne rest in peace and power.
With love,
Leslie, April, Marva & Doug
Dear Aunt Suzzy,
Mom told me that Uncle Keith had passed. He was a lovely man, and you both have been wonderful godparents and beloved friends to my parents. I still remember your helping organize my wedding and guide my guests to their places. I’m forever grateful to have you as my godmother! God bless you.
Much love,
Thea
Dear Suzzy, Ashley, Margaret and family,
Vince and I are deeply sorry for your loss, and we grieve with you dear friend. We were honored to be with you and your family for Keith’s beautiful funeral ceremony. It was a blessing to see Ashley and Margaret and their families. Our friendship has always been a treasure even though we have been separated after our move south. There are only a few friends that stay connected for years, but ours has stood the test of time, as well as distance. We could always unite via phone or email as if we had never been apart.. We shared so many years of joys and sorrows, but such is life. We have a common union as sisters in Christ that is dear to me. And I do pray that we can get together again for a long overdue cup of tea.
Love and prayers,
Carol and Vince